Unless you have been under a rock the last month and a half, you are well aware and quite possibly affected by the Covid-19 pandemic. It swooped in like a tsunami and truly f'd some shit up!
One of the biggest adjustments has been for students and school systems from pre-k to institutions of higher learning. Most schools have closed indefinitely along with all of the activities associated with the last semester and the summer.
So what does all of that mean???
The kids are home. All. Of. The. Time.
I'm sure for some, this extra family time is ABSOLUTELY AMAZING.
However, for others it is tremendously inconvenient.
Don't get me wrong, we all know you love your children. But going from breakfast to lunch to dinner to 5,000 snacks in the meantime in between time to recess to nap time to field trips and Google Classroom, and Lord Jesus Christ everything else. And that is in conjunction with your life and how you have to adjust. Combining all of that with a difficult co-parent can be a recipe for disaster!
Please, take a deep breath.
It is definitely challenging, but it does not have to be damaging.
As a family mediator, I see a multitude of co-parenting issues, especially when it involves sudden life changes. If you or someone you know is having some quarantine co-parent difficulties, here are some tips I've compiled based on what I've learned from my clients during the current pandemic.
1. Keep calm and understand that this is affecting EVERYONE
Yes, this is a trying time and you have your children way more often than not and you can pretty much forget about summer camp. Take a deep breath! It's ok! Panicking will automatically stress you out and make you less open minded with your child's other parent.
Understand that this is happening to both of you, whether or not one or both of you have been financially impacted by Covid, everyone is going through some significant change at this time. Be respectful of the fact your co-parent is adjusting as well. That way, you are keeping things in perspective when negotiating new agreements due to these unprecedented times.
2. Be Flexible as possible
You may be asked to pick up your child from Grandma's when your work day is over opposed to your co-parent because they may be working overtime as an essential worker. Or you may be asked to keep your child for an entire week opposed to your scheduled weekend because your co-parent is working from home and needs to focus on a big project, while you may be at home collecting unemployment. Be considerate. Be Flexible.
3. Share the Homeschooling responsibilities
One parent may be the primary residential parent, however, that doesn't mean the primary parent should take on all of the new-found teaching responsibilities. Be open to developing a teaching schedule where both of you share the homeschooling load.
In which subjects do you excel?
Does your current career or business offer you specialized insight that could benefit your child at this time?
Did you work from home originally and have a system that would afford you the discipline to work and help with the kid's education, giving your co-parent a little breathing room?
Think about negotiating a schedule that incorporates your child's homeschooling. Maybe you could pick up your child a couple days a week during normal school hours and take them back home before dinner on some of your scheduled off days. That way, both parents are participating in the child's education, while striking a balance with work and personal activities.
This is by no means an exhaustive list, just a few tips to assist in navigating co-parenting during quarantine.
If you have any co-parent quarantine tips or need assistance with your parenting plan please comment below or reach out to me on one of my platforms and I will be more than happy to hear from you!!
Thanks for Reading!
Nasha